A few days after "flood day" I was driving home from the store and found a ROAD CLOSED sign off to the side on the road I was on. I hesitated--should I go? Just then, a Fed*Ex truck zoomed past me down the road. "Good enough," I thought, but I proceeded carefully, looking ahead to see if there was any water in the road.
There wasn't any. Not a drop. As a matter of fact, it hadn't rained in two days.
The Fed*Ex truck turned into a subdivision, and I kept going...
...right into a COP TRAP. AAAAAAAAAAAh!!
I've been pulled over before...Never cried once. But this time, I was straight up into the ugly cry and could. not. pull. it. together. I'm sure the guy thought I was trying to get out of the ticket, but I was genuinely REALLY upset, REALLY mad at myself.
So did my tears change anything? Nope. I still got my big fat stinkin' $130 ticket that I am taking on extra work to pay off. But here's the thing--I honestly thought I was not really going to get that ticket. I thought my justifications for heading down that road were totally legitimate...
* I thought maybe they hadn't picked up all the ROAD CLOSED signs after the flooding
* there was NO water anywhere
* the road looked fine as far as I could see
* the sign was off to the side
* I just followed the Fed*Ex truck...
...but so what? The sign said ROAD CLOSED. Enough said. I should not have been driving down that road. I drove right past the sign that told me to stay away. I wish I had followed that instruction. I didn't, and I am paying (literally) dearly for it.
After being handed my ticket, I headed back to where I came and found another car heading down the same path I had just taken--a path that led to consequence. I flagged the driver down and urged, "Turn around! Don't go this way!" That driver listened to me, turned around, and headed away from the consequence.
Smart guy. Wish I'd been so smart.
I get it, Lord. Thank You for calling me to obedience. I don't want to sin so that grace can abound, I want to obey. I really do. None of this "Oh, I thought this was a gray area" or "But I know You'll forgive me." Only obedience. And just because I don't always get why it's so important for me to heed the warning, still you say, "Obey." Enough said.
Thank you that you discipline those You love. Thank you for calling me to something deeper than excuses and countless ways to justify my sin. Thank you for correcting me--though it hurts, though it is not pleasant in the least, I am thankful that I'm justified by your death and resurrection. I know You love me.
"No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but instead is painful (Preach it!!!). But later on it produces a harvest of godliness and peace for those who are trained by it." Hebrews 12: 11
P.S. Recently I saw the other entrance to Nance Road, the road on which I got my ticket. When I saw the mess on the other side, it struck fear in my heart. Let's just say that from where I actually was on that forbidden road, I couldn't see it, but I was headed for danger. I was actually quite fortunate that police officer was there to intercept me and turn me around toward safety.